-----Original Message-----
From: OFFICE OF THE HOLY FATHER
[mailto:office_ofthe_holyfather@vaticanchurch.com]
Sent: Monday, May 30, 2005 4:30 AM
Subject: RE: OFFER FROM THE VATICAN CHURCH, VATICAN CITY.
Attn: Your Humble Goodself.
RE: OFFER FROM THE VATICAN CHURCH, VATICAN
CITY.
Greetings to you from the office of the Holy
Father of the Vatican Church, Vatican City, Rome Italy.
We are writing this letter to you today as
a Holy offer/opportunity to work for the Vatican Church, Vatican
City Rome Italy, as our only official secret distributor of charity
funds to our several registered charity organizations around this
global earth with topmost secrecy.
In August 9 1903 when Giuseppe Sarto assumed
office as the second pope of the Vatican Church Vatican city as
Pope Pius PP. X, he included a new amendment to the constitution
of the Vatican Church, which relates that as a result of the continuous
rising several cases of corruption and mis-use of the funds allocated
by the Vatican Church to charity organizations, via the power
of the Cardinals of the Vatican Church, the appointment of the
official distributor of funds allocated by the Vatican Church
for distribution to registered charity organizations, MUST be
secretly issued to a non Vatican Church individual/personnel,
who must be unknown by all living person's except the office of
the Holy Father and the official holy Treasurer of the Vatican
Church, in-order to curb and eliminate the continuous rising several
cases of corruption and mis-use of the charity funds, since without
the knowledge of the official distributor by any other personnel
of the Vatican Church except from the office of the Holy Father
and the official holy treasurer of the Vatican Church, the corruption
cases would be brought to an immediate halt, and this new measure
worked perfectly well from that time till this current time frame.
In the Addendum of this new amendment contained
in the constitution of the Vatican Church, it is also clearly
stated that every new Pope assuming office in the Vatican Church,
must select a new official secret distributor for his regime,
and upon his death, his selected official secret distributor must
immediately have his/her post terminated, with the replacement
of a new official secret distributor, secretly chosen by the new
governing Pope only.
And with the passing away of our previous Pope,
Ioannes Paulus PP. II Karol Wojtyla as Pope John Paul II on April
the 2nd of 2005, and with the recent appointment of I Joseph Ratzinger
as Pope Benedictus XVI on April the 19th of 2005, the previous
secret distributor in Pope John Paul II time has been relieved
of his position, and as a result a new secret distributor is immediately
required without delay to serve till my regime is over via death.
In the light of the above related sentences,
you have been nominated by this Holy office of the Holy Father
of the Vatican Church Vatican City, to be our secret distributor
of charity funds to our several registered charity organizations
around this global earth SECRETLY with topmost secrecy, in which
you would be continually paid a commission of 10% only, of every
total amount of funds released to your goodself every four (4)
months by the reputable funds organization the Vatican Church
holds its charity funds in, for immediate distribution to our
several registered charity organizations around the world, as
charity funds from the Vatican Church Vatican City.
In-order to pre-qualify for this secret official
Holy post in the Vatican Church, you must satisfy our basic requirements
below;
1. You must be a honest, straightforward and
God fearing individual.
2 You must be an aristocrat or an influential
rich individual with a designated bank account in a reputable
Bank, which can completely and always accommodate the released
charity funds to your goodself, without the need of questioning
by relevant authorities.
3. You must be 100% fully ready and oblige
to keep your post as our only official secret distributor of charity
funds as Topmost secret, and guide this secret post in the Vatican
Church Vatican City with your life. 4. You must not for any reason
perform as not required by the office of the Holy Father i.e embezzlement
and mis-use of charity funds. 5. You must at all time adhere fully
and promptly to the instructions furnished your goodself by the
office of the Holy Father of the Vatican Church.
Please kindly note that, Age, Sex, Religion,
and Nationality, does not in any way affect your qualification
eligibility, so if your humble goodself is confident and eligible
for this secret holy post in the Vatican church, please kindly
respond immediately to this electronic message by sending your
personal response to our direct secret email address at (officeofthe_holyfather@vaticanchurch-va.org)
from your private/personal email address without delay, and we
shall guide you through the mandatory required steps to attain
the secret holy post.
Thank you for your time as we expect your goodself
to keep this electronic contact as topmost secret, in-order to
protect the interest of the Vatican Church, Vatican City, Rome
Italy, while we await your personal response from your personal
email address to our secret email address.
Remain blessed and best regard's from the office
of the Holy Father of the Vatican Church and please take time
out to visit our official website at (www.vaticanchurch.org) and
to view our profile please kindly visit (http://www.vaticanchurch.org/holy_father/benedict_xvi/index.htm)
God Bless you.
Office of the Vatican Church,
Pope Benedictus XVI
Joseph Ratzinger
Pope,
Vatican Church,
Vatican City.
Rome, Italy.
Website address: http://www.vaticanchurch.org
Hi, Pope:
It would be the highest honor indeed to serve the Church in the
esteemed position of Official Secret Distributor of Charity Funds
around the Global Earth. As the sole owner/operator of a very
lucrative enterprise, Grand Canal Tours of Central Arizona, I
am very experienced with the above-board handling of large sums
of money. I also am well versed as a distributor, having canvassed
Gila Bend neighborhoods on behalf of Avon and Amway during my
formative years.
It also will please you to know that I am a life-long Catholic
who served the church in my youth. I will not go into details,
but my experience as an alter boy has reaped great financial dividends
in recent years for me and my legal representative.
Regarding your basic requirements:
1. I am a straightforward individual and in fact I've been told
I have great posture.
2. I am influential and independently wealthy.
3. I am fully ready.
4. I would never embezzle, lie or mislead anybody.
5. I will abide by the Holy Father's instructions.
Please provide me additional details as soon as possible. I await
your holy word.
Your humble servant,
Brad Christensen
President and CEO
Grand Canal Tours of Central Arizona
Gila Bend, AZ USA
----- Original Message -----
From: <officeofthe_holyfather@vaticanchurch-va.org>
To: <bradchristensen@cox.net>
Sent: Wednesday, June 01, 2005 5:42 AM
Subject: [Auto-Reply] Re: OFFER FROM THE VATICAN CHURCH, VATICAN
CITY
Dearest beloved,
We are in receipt of your email to this office, and we shall read
your email carefully and furnish your promptly with our response.
Remain blessed and best regard's,
Office of the Vatican Church,
Pope Benedictus XVI
Joseph Ratzinger
Pope,
Vatican Church,
Vatican City.
Rome, Italy.
Website address: http://www.vaticanchurch.org
Dearest Pope:
I received your auto-reply three days ago but have heard nothing
from you since. I know you're a busy man, but so am I. In fact,
the busy season for Grand Canal Tours of Central Arizona is approaching.
Our trips offer lovers a romantic desert respite that would rival
anything your Venice has to offer. Sure my gondola may be a bit
porous since it's fashioned from a hollowed-out dead cactus, but
my customers don't seem to mind. Water up to their ankles offers
a welcome cooling sensation, plus they understand a little bailing
is good for their body and the soul.
We offer trips throughout the vast network of irrigation canals
from Casa Grande to Eloy. Occasionally we even sneak our craft
into the mighty Central Arizona Project canal for a grand voyage
all the way to Pima County. For a map of the CAP canal, click
this link: http://www.cap-az.com/operations/index.cfm?action=map&subSection=14
Trust me - there is no more romantic a place than the Arizona
desert, especially during wildfire season. The flames give the
sunsets an extra-rosy glow. And, as you might suspect, they truly
are a majestic sight to behold after nightfall. Yes, we even pack
marshmallows.
But I'd be wrong to suggest only lovers are attracted to my voyages.
The scientific community - especially entomologists - cannot escape
the lure of my gondola. After all, the Arizona desert abounds
with insects the size of rats. I have attached a photo of one
of our finer specimens.
With deepest respect,
Brad Christensen
President/CEO
Central Arizona Grand Canal Tours
Gila Bend, Arizona
Back
to the Exhibit