----- Original Message -----
From: "MR PRINCE WILL FORTUNE" <prince_wf2000@yahoo.ca>
To: <bradchristensen@cox.net>
Sent: Tuesday, November 23, 2004 1:38 PM
Subject: MR PRINCE WILL FORTUNE
Mr. Princewill Fortune
Rue Portin X Blaize
Diagne St. Louis Senegal
Email: prince_wf2000@yahoo.ca
Tel:+221 571 9140
Date:23th november,2004.
Attention: President/C.E.O
I am a branch manager of a Security Company
here in St Luis-Senegal. I got your address and good profile from
one of your country's CD RUM BUSINESS DIRECTORIES.
There is a deal I wish to tender for your considerations
and acceptance to execute with me.
It was a week ago that one new customer came
to my office and declared his interest to deposit two trunk boxes
containing photographic materials with my company for a period
of four weeks only. I then took the boxes into the inspection
room which is next door to my office.
In line with my company's operational proceedures,
I gave him "Deposit Application Forms" to complete with
his passport photographs. I then informed him that the managing
director of my company will have to inspect the content of the
boxes before his application forms could be endorsed and Deposit
Certificate issued to him as depositor. I noticed that he became
unconfortable immediately I told him that the boxes would be inspected.
It is because of my suspicion that I decided
to personally go to the MD's office to inform him that we have
a new customer who wants to deposit itmes. To my greatest surprise,
I came back to my office to see that the man was already making
his way out my office with the two boxes. When my personal security
was trying to stop him, he hastely jumped into his car and ran
away. Unfortuantely, he could not make his escape with one of
the boxes.
I took the left over box and went to my office.
I was shocked when I opened it and found out that it contains
United States of American dollars in "Hundred Dollar"
bills. After the official working hours, I stayed back and counted
the money. It is original Fourty Million American Dollars .
Fortunately, when I was listening to African
news the next day, the same man that came to my office was shown
on televison. The news is that the man is a rebel leader in Angola
who ran away with the group's money made from sales of gold from
the area under his control in Angola.
Presently, I am the only person who knows about
this money and since there is now records in my company regarding
its existence, I am contacting you to seek your permision and
advice on how to urgently make shipment of this money to Europe
in your name as the beneficiary of the consignment. You shall
travel to Europe to receive it for safe keeping pending my arrival
to meet you over there.
After the deal, I want 20% of this money to
be shared to some charity homes to be decided by you and I. Then
we shall share equally the remaing 80%. I will solely rely on
your business experience/advise to invest my share of the transaction
in your country.
Please acknowledge immediately receipt of this
confidential and important messageif you are interested.
Mr. Princewill Fortune
Dear Princewill Fortune:
You have come to the right person for assistance. As a highly
paid surgeon to the rich and famous, I am accustomed to handling
large sums of money. I have a window of opportunity for travel
to Europe in December, between a scheduled surgery early in the
month to recover Ben Affleck's lost talent and the annual Christmas
feast at my mansion in Blythe, Calif.
However, before I agree to become involved in this opportunity,
you first must tell me more about yourself and clear up a few
confusing comments in your e-mail. First, I drink only the finest
champagne, so why did you find me in the "rum business directories?"
Secondly, why did the man jump into his car and run away? Wouldn't
it have been faster if he drove away? Wouldn't the car start?
I agree to keep our association and dealings absolutely confidential
so please do not hesitate in responding to my questions.
Brad Christensen, M.D.
----- Original Message -----
From: <princefortune@ubbi.com>
To: <bradchristensen@cox.net>
Sent: Friday, November 26, 2004 4:33 AM
Subject: i need your mail Very Urgent
Attn: Brad Christensen,
I am in receipt of your mail in response to
my proposal. Thanks for your prompt reply. I hope you should not
purnish me for poor enlish language expressions. What I intend
to state as per where I got your contact is "CD ROM DIRECTORY".
I suspect that the man ran away because he did not know that we
shall request for his proper identification before we sign the
deposit forms he is supposed to fill. He probably thought he can
succeed in depositing the cases with us with fake identity. But
when he understands that his international passport would be required
from him and out of guilty concience of the source of the money
with him, he decided to escape instead of diplomatically decide
not to deposit with us again. As regards my indentity, I will
send to you photograph page of my international passport.
I contacted you mostly to benefit from your
wide experience and advice in investing my share after this transaction.
I am pleased you know that secrecy and confidentiality is the
secret of success of a deal of this nature. You are not expected
to discuss this transaction with anybody no matter how friendly
the person appears to you.
Please if there is any more clarification you
think is necessary before we proceed, please do not fail to request
for that. I wait to hearing from you.
Yours sincerely,
Mr. Princewill
Dear Princewill Fortune:
I apologize for the delayed response, but Thanksgiving is a busy
holiday for the surgeon to the rich and famous. So many guests
at my mansion in Blythe! Michael Jackson, Jack Nicholson, Sally
Field, Totie Fields, Hilary and Howard Duff, Hillary and George
Clinton, Sir Edmund Hillary, Pee Wee Herman, Sponge Bob, to name
just a few.
Anyway, please send a photo and additional details about yourself
and our transaction. I remain a bit confused by your latest e-mail
which makes it clear the man did run away instead of drive away.
But why would he leave his vehicle behind? Where is the car now?
Hopefully you didn't try to start it. Maybe it was booby trapped
with a car bomb. I pray that you are okay and not an unsightly
reddish puree strewn about the roadside.
To your health,
Brad Christensen, MD
Nov. 29, 2004
Dear Princewill Fortune:
Why haven't you responded to my last e-mail? I pray that you
are well and have not met some horrible fate. Please let me know.
If you are injured, I can be of assistance because I am a surgeon
with much experience.
Brad Christensen, MD
----- Original Message -----
From: <princefortune@ubbi.com>
To: <bradchristensen@cox.net>
Sent: Monday, November 29, 2004 8:46 AM
Subject: Very Urgent
Dear Dr. Brad
I am in receipt of your two consecutive emails.
Thanks for your concern about my health. I hope you should stop
misunderstanding my explanations. The prospective customer drove
away with his car. Comments on this kind of issue non trevial.
It is because of your wide experience and connections
in the corridors of power that compels me to seek your participation
in movement of this money out of my country. Howerever, you have
not yet confirmed your readiness to be in Amsterdam to receive
the consignment. Secondly, you have not given me your contact
address, private telephone and fax numbers which shall be stated
in the shipment receipt as the consignee.
I am aware that you are a very busy person,
but I enjoin you to spare a little time to transaction so that
we can conclude it within time scheduled. I will send you more
details of this business and my photo when I come from break.
Best Regards,
Mr. Princewill
Dear Princewell Fortune:
So very glad to hear you're in good health, at least physically.
Some of the comments in your latest missive have me pondering
your mental state, however.
You never mentioned Amsterdam before. You also never asked for
my address or any other information before, so why does it surprise
you that you haven't received it? Finally, what in the world does
"issue non trevial" mean in English?
I mentioned previously that I have a window of opportunity between
early December when I am scheduled to perform a difficult talent
transfer procedure on Ben Affleck and Christmas when I host the
annual festival at my Blythe mansion. Please quickly provide additional
details regarding your proposed Amsterdam trip. I have no wooden
shoes. Is that okay or will I need to rush out and get some?
My address is 51 N. Robin Leach Lane, Blythe, CA 92102. My phone
is XXX-XXX-XXXX and fax is XXX-XXX-XXXX. I have attached a photo
of myself from last year's Christmas festival. Please send me
a photo of you without further delay.
To your health,
Brad Christensen, MD
----- Original Message -----
From: <princefortune@ubbi.com>
To: <bradchristensen@cox.net>
Sent: Wednesday, December 01, 2004 5:20 AM
Subject: Very Urgent
Dear Brad
I am in receipt of your mail with attached photograph.
I have attached herewith my own photograph.
The update now with our business is that the
money is already in custody of diplomatic courier company awaiting
for shipment to Amsterdam. It is contained in two cases. It is
tagged Embassy of Gambia Consignment. Hon. Diplomat Jeremy Paul
Donn with Gambia Embassy shall accompnay th luggag to Amsterdam.
Recall that I told you that the diplomatic courier
company would not know the true content of the consignment to
avoid questions on the source of the money which I cannot expose.
Hon. Jeremy does not also know that the cases contain money because
he might refuse to assist in sending the cases to Amsterdam with
his diplomatic identity and immunity. I told him that it contains
jewelleries.
I am presently waiting for Hon. Jeremy to bring
the shipment cost from the courier company. As soon as I get the
shipment cost and get it paid, I will notify you on the date of
shipment to Amsterdam. This shall enable you plan your trip to
Amsterdam for collection of the consignment as the consignee.
You will expose the true content of the cases
to Hon. Jeremy when he hands over the boxes to you because I will
then ask him to assist us open in your name a temporal domiciliary
bank account in Amsterdam where the whole money would be paid
into and from there wire the funds to your bank account in your
country where we both shall meet for sharing/investment.
Regards,
Mr. Princewill
Dear Princewill Fortune:
Thank you for sending along some of the details of our business
along with your impressive photo. I believe we have quite a lot
in common, for I struggle with a similar spillage problem when
I use too much mustard or ketchup.
I do need to make it clear to you that my trip to Amsterdam must
be scheduled between Dec. 10 and Dec. 20 or else it will have
to wait until after New Year's Day. That is because my talent-restoration
surgery on film star Ben Affleck is scheduled for Dec. 9 and I
must be back at my mansion in Blythe by Dec. 20 to prepare for
the Christmas and New Year's Eve celebrations. Please provide
more precise details about the timing of the trip and I will purchase
a plane ticket.
Your e-mail failed to clear up an important matter. Will wooden
shoes be needed for the trip to Holland or won't they? Certainly
you've read Hans Christian Andersen, in which wooden shoes seem
to be mandatory. I certainly do not want to arrive in Amsterdam
and be ostracized and ridiculed because I am wearing my Gucci
or Bruno Magli shoes rather than a Weyerhaeuser model..
Dr. Brad Christensen
----- Original Message -----
From: <princefortune@ubbi.com>
To: <bradchristensen@cox.net>
Sent: Wednesday, December 01, 2004 1:18 PM
Subject: Very Urgent
Dear Dr. Brad,
Unfortunately, I do not understand you what
you mean by wooden shoes . Can you explain.
Mr. Princewill
Dear Princewell Fortune:
My word sir! I thought you were a man of the world but apparently
you must not get out much. An Internet search on Google for "wooden
shoes" and "Amsterdam" or "Holland" turned
up 24,100 matches. Everybody must be wearing them over there.
They probably litter the countryside, squeezing out the tulips.
Check out these links:
http://www.cloggieshop.com/
http://home.deds.nl/~quip/archief/culture/
wooden%20shoes%20hans%20brinker%20fout_bestanden/hans.html
I need to know from your man in Amsterdam if I can avoid wearing
these things. They look clumsy and while clomping around in them,
I fear I might accidentally throw one and injure somebody. Also,
painted flowers on shoes aren't my thing. Nevertheless, I will
wear them if I must because our business venture is extremely
important. Please respond as soon as possible so I can put my
mind at rest.
Dr. Brad Christensen
----- Original Message -----
From: <princefortune@ubbi.com>
To: <bradchristensen@cox.net>
Sent: Thursday, December 02, 2004 11:39 AM
Subject: Very Urgent
Dear Dr. Brad
Be as you want. There is regulations or restrictions
on how someone looks. The diplomat works with Gambia Embassy here
and is still here. He will make his trip to Amsterdam when the
consignment is ready to be moved.
He has brought the shipment cost. He earlier
told me that the shipment would cost about US$16,000.00 and this
what I kept for the shipment. But the charges as accessed by the
courier company is US$32,415.27. According the Hon. Jeremy, the
cost of shipment for carrying diplomatic luggages was increased
by 100% since January this year without his knowledge because
he has not lifted any luggage for his embassy since this year.
He has however, appologized for this mis-information.
This means I need extral US$16,415.27 to complete
the shipment charges. The unfortunate thing is that I have already
sent the cases of the money to the courier office for shipment
and cannot have access to the money again. I cannot have access
because the boxes have been sealed and tagged with embassy of
Gambia.
Meanwhile, the US$16,000 is my personal money
and not from the box. I did not touch even a cent from the US$40,000,000.00
the shipment charges would be paid in local currency and it would
be easy to change foreign currency to local currency here because
we do not operate parallel market. To obtain foreign exchange,
one has to apply to Central Bank of Senegal through ministry of
finance. At the end of it, one can only be given US$2,000 in four
weeks. Due to the nature of our business, I want to use my persoanal
money to make the shipment instead of the money in the boxes.
The complete the shipment cost, I have made
some contacts to raise money from friends. But I am only hoping
to get US$10,000.00. So I will still need the US$6,415 to make
up. I want you to assist in raise this amount from your side as
I have exhausted all avenues I can get money.
I will know the date of shipment to Amsterdam
from the courier company as soon as the shipment charge is paid.
To speedy the process, send the remaining Us$6,415 by western
union money transfer to my name.
Princewill Fortune Bonaventure.
Rue Portin X Blaize
Diagne St. Dakar-Senegal
I am waiting to hear from you.
Regards,
Mr. Princewill
Dear Princewill Fortune Bonaventure:
I had no idea "Fortune" was your middle name. Forgive
me for past transgressions in addressing you as Princewell Fortune.
The $6,415 is no problem for me -- one day's work on Sponge Bob.
I will bring a check for that amount with me to Amsterdam. Again,
when should I schedule my flight? It must be between Dec.10 and
Dec. 20 as I mentioned before. Please take note of this! Write
it down so you won't forget.
On another matter, you still have not resolved the wooden shoes
issue. If there are "regulations or restrictions on how someone
looks" in Amsterdam, will they haul me away if I show up
without wooden shoes? This is important! I do not want to have
authorities confiscate my Bruno Maglis and spend time in jail
with cold feet! Please do your best to promptly resolve this issue,
Mr. Bonaventure.
Respectfully,
Dr. Brad Christensen
Blythe, Calif;, USA
----- Original Message -----
From: <princefortune@ubbi.com>
To: <bradchristensen@cox.net>
Sent: Friday, December 03, 2004 10:02 AM
Subject: Very Urgent
Dear Dr. Brad
In my last email to you, It seems that I omitted
some important words that would make you understand me. In Amsterdam,
you can wear any thing you want.
I wanted to say that there is no regulations
or restrictions to what somebody wears.
Secondly, you mis-understand me on issue of
US$6,415. This money is required here in Senegal and cash, for
payment of the shipment charges to Amsterdam. I have already with
me the sum of US$16,000 and have good promises to get another
US$10,000 by Monday from friends. So I still need you to send
by western union the sum of US$6,415 to enable me complete the
shipments charges.
I hope you will understand me this time.
Mr. Princewill
Dear Princewell Fortune Bonaventure:
Thank goodness no wooden shoes are required. I was beginning
to worry about that due to the possibility of termites and bark
beetles taking residence underneath my toenails.
On that other matter, I don't believe I misunderstand you a bit.
I did not become the wealthy surgeon to the rich and famous by
cavalierly tossing large sums of money to people I've never met.
How do I know you are who you say you are? Do you have an AARP
card? Well, I do and I get discounts on movies. How about a driver's
license, passport, Blockbuster card or some other form of I.D.
you can show me? I have attached a scan of my California driver's
license. Please reciprocate by sending me something that will
identify you as the one and only Princewell Fortune Bonaventure.
Dr. Brad Christensen
----- Original Message -----
From: PRINCEWILL FORTUNE BONAVENTURE
To: bradchristensen@cox.net
Sent: Monday, December 06, 2004 11:00 AM
Subject: Identity
Dear Brad,
I could easily attach through my email address.
So I used alternative email address. But continue communication
through :princefortune@ubbi.com.
I appologise for the delay in responding to
your email. I was out of the city since Friday for an official
assignment Unfortunatey, the there was no internet connectivity
to be able to access my mails. I just came back and received your
mals.
As you requested, I have attached herewith,
my national identity card and one of the slips of an electric
bill issued and paid in my name. This is to assure you that I
am a senegalese, live and work in Senegal and pay by bills.
While sending the money, split it into three
parts and send with under listed names.
The names are:-
1. Nwabia Chinedu
7 Leoplold Sedar Senghor
Dakar Senegal.
2. Ibezim Oscar Kelvin
Rue 10 Unit 15, Parcelles
Dakar-Senegal.
3. Okafor Fidelis Akwuba
5 Yoff, Dakar Senegal.
Please remember that you should keep this deal
very confidential. Never tell anybody, even the people at western
union the reason for sending the money. If your bank people ask
you or any body, tell them that the money is for African artifects
you want to bring to your country. With this excuse, our business
would not be exposed.
Please remember that after sending the money,
you should send to me the full names/addresses of the senders,
the secret question/answer and western union control number of
the transfer to enable us receive the money in western union office
here in Senegal.
Waiting anxiuosly for your response. Take good
care of yourself.
Yours sincerely,
Princewill.
Dear Princewill Fortune Boneradventure:
Thanks for sending along your I.D. and your electric bill. The
photo looks familiar even without the spillage. I remain a bit
confused however. Your I.D. says your address is "24 Av.
Lumine Gueye." The electric bill says it's "93 Ave Blaise
Diagne." You wrote in previous e-mails your address was on
"Rue Portin X Blaize." How is it that you live in three
places? Do you split the week up? Isn't the constant packing and
unpacking a bother? And when do you find time for the laundry?
I'm also a tad bewildered about another point. In your Dec. 2
e-mail you asked that all $6,415 be sent to you. Now on Dec. 6
you ask me to split it among three people you've never mentioned
before, leaving none of it for you. And since the money is to
pay the balance of shipment costs to Amsterdam, why would it go
to these three guys anyway instead of your previously mentioned
diplomatic courier, Hon. Jeremy? Boy am I confused. It must be
that I'm just not thinking straight. I'm getting up there in years
and probably need more vitamins.
At this juncture, I think it would be best if we first met each
other before finalizing our transaction. I personally prefer conducting
business matters face to face with a handshake and a wink. I am
free to travel anywhere -- including Amsterdam or Senegal -- after
I finish up on the critically important Ben Affleck surgery on
Thursday, Dec. 9. What are your thoughts regarding my proposal?
Dr. Brad Christensen
----- Original Message -----
From: princefortune@ubbi.com
To: bradchristensen@cox.net
Sent: Tuesday, December 07, 2004 4:34 AM
Subject: RE:Re: Identity
Brad
It seems to me that you are not realistic
and focused to this transaction, otherwised there will be no need
of all these unnecessary complaints and suspicion.
Personally, I cannot participate in a deal I
do not have confidence and trust. So I suppose that a man of your
high social status suppose to say without fear or favour that you
are not interested in a deal if you do not have confidence
or suspect the business.
Fortunately, my photograph I sent to
you earlier is the same photograph used in my National ID. How
can you then be talking of similarity in one and same photo.
The way you mentioned about addresses surprises me. Does
it mean that my office address must be same with my
residence address. For clarification purpose, you suppose
to know that the address in my electric bill is my residence address
and the other is my office.
As regards sending money, check your records
well because I never ask you to send the $6,415 directly Hon.
Jeremy. I now gave you three names because I later understand
that western union has restrictions over there on the maximum
amount that can be sent a day by one person. So spliting the money
is for easy transfer due to restrictions after 11th Sept. 2001
attack in USA. The names are my friends who will help me collect
the money in western union office here. It does not simply mean
that the money belongs to them.
I cannot pay a ticket to come to Amsterdam for a meeting while
the consignment is still here. If you are still interest send
the money as directed. But if you cannot continue in this way
let me know so that I will look for alternative.
Princewill
Dear Princewill Fortune Boneradventure:
You are incorrect to suggest that I'm not serious about this transaction
because I am. You say I have made "all these unnecessary
complaints," but I have re-read my past correspondence and
can find no complaints whatsoever, only reasonable questions about
shoe regulations and other matters. If you cannot fly to
Amsterdam to meet me, I can fly to Senegal or any other West Africa
country to meet you. I have achieved what you call my "high
social status" by dealing personally with people in business
affairs, not with wire transfers across the North American
continent and the Atlantic Ocean.
I will be free to travel between Dec. 10 and Dec. 20. For
the immediate present I must focus on preparing for the critical
$450,000 Ben Affleck talent-infusion surgery. Ben was flying
high in 1997 with "Good Will Hunting" and in 1998 with
the Academy Award winning "Shakespeare in Love." But
then came "Gigli" a few years ago, followed by "Jersey
Girl" and finally the terrible "Surviving Christmas."
Now even the AFLAC duck gets better reviews.
Our surgical team has determined that Affleck is too far gone for
a return to even a lower tier as an actor. Therefore
we plan to do just enough neuron tweaking so he
can get by as a Las Vegas performer. We feel we can implant
a few jokes, reduce his fight-or-flight response and send him
out there as a comedian and lion tamer. With such a
dual talent he'd make it big at the MGM Grand.
Dr. Brad Christensen
----- Original Message -----
From: princefortune@ubbi.com
To: bradchristensen@cox.net
Sent: Wednesday, December 08, 2004 4:27 AM
Subject: Reply
Brad,
I got your mail and you did not mention anything about the shipment
cost of US$6,415 which suppose to come from your side instead
you are talking greek. I said that I cannot come to Amsterdam
without the consignment also being sent there.
I do not understand clearly you suggestion of coming to Senegal.
Is it to have a face to face meeting before the money is re-located
out of Senegal?. If it is your idea, then it is okay. You should
arrange and come to Senegal. But I cannot travel to Amsterdam
without the box.
I am saying all these because it is not possible to send
this money out of Senegal by bank transfer without the authorities
asking proof of the source of the money which I have always
told you that I cannot expose. I am ready to be in Amsterdam any
moment. But the outstanding issue now is US$6,415 to completing
the shiping charge to Amsterdam. I repeat, I cannot go to
Amsterdam without the consignment. It makes me stupid and
foolish.
So the options now are,
1. If you do not have confidence in me and this business or my
sincerity either you come to Senegal to discuss with me personally
on how the money would be moved cash out of Senegal or you send
the US$6,415 to complete shipment charge to Amsterdam where we
should meet between 10th-20th December.
I am waiting for your response.
Princewill
Dear Princewill Fortune Boneradventure:
How dare you suggest I'm "talking Greek."
That is impossible - my mother had no facial hair. I was
talking about flying to Senegal and bringing the $6,415 with
me. This is written in plain English, so if you have
difficulties understanding ask any child down the street for a
translation. I will not endure any more of your accusations
and insults. I am a busy man who now must prepare for
tomorrow morning's difficult surgery on Ben Affleck. Let
me know immediately if you are interested in meeting me in Senegal.
Dr. Brad Christensen
Dear Princewill Fortune Boneradventure:
I am free to travel to Senegal now after completing the very difficult
talent-restoration surgery on Ben Affleck this morning. We eliminated
much atrophied gray matter; far more than we anticipated and nearly
as much as we encountered a couple years ago during our challenging
work on Britney Spears. What remained of Ben's brain, I dare say,
was insufficient for a career as a comedian/lion tamer or a Las
Vegas entertainer of any type.
Nevertheless the surgery was a success since we achieved a heightened
talent level. The improvement, although slight, will qualify Ben
for work as a flea circus operator at a lesser gambling venue.
With a little prodding, the Fantasy Springs Indian Casino on I-10
in Indio may be interested in him. And should there be a relapse,
the casino's just 96 miles west of my facilities in Blythe.
Now to the important matters at hand. I'm ready for the trip to
Senegal. I'd like to schedule it as soon as possible and have
already packed my bags. There is a flight that leaves Los Angeles
on Dec. 11 at 11:15 p.m. and arrives at Dakar at 6:20 a.m. on
Dec. 13. It is an American Airlines flight that connects in New
York with South African Airways flight 204. Let me know immediately
if this timing will work for you and I will purchase my ticket.
All the best,
Dr. Brad Christensen
----- Original Message -----
From: princefortune@ubbi.com
To: bradchristensen@cox.net
Sent: Friday, December 10, 2004 4:08 AM
Subject: OKAY
Dear Brad,
First of all I want to congratulate you for
another success you have made in talented surgery. Present generation
and the ones yet to come would always appreciate the work God
is doing to mankind through your talent.
Yes, your proposed 11th-13th flight schedule
is very appropriate. Please purchase your ticket and confirm it
at that date.
Let me know your flight number and time of
arrival so that I will personally be at the airport to receive
you.
Best regards,
Mr. Princewill.
Dear Princewill Fortune Boneradventure:
Thank you so very much for your heartfelt comments about my surgical
exploits. It feels good to be appreciated. While the work of a
surgeon to the rich and famous is financially rewarding, at times
I feel under-appreciated by some of my self-centered and vain
clients. That is not the case with Ben Affleck, however. He has
showered me with praise for saving him from a life of B-movies
and press ridicule.
You'll be pleased to learn that Ben already has signed a contract
as a flea circus performer with Fantasy Springs Indian Casino.
They've guaranteed him access to a plentiful supply of performers.
A pack of coyotes frequents the casino's garbage bin so Ben only
needs a little moxie for a bountiful harvest.
I've researched on-line reviews of this casino and believe Ben
will be impressed. "Easy access from freeway," said
one reviewer. "Not so crowded," said another. "The
hotdog for $1.50 was the best bargain," stated a third.
I am looking forward to our meeting. My plane leaves LAX at 11:15
p.m. Dec. 11 and arrives at the Dakar airport at 6:20 a.m. on
Dec. 13. It is South African Airways flight 204. While I realize
my arrival may be a little early in the morning, I ask you to
promise to meet me there. Tell me what you will be wearing so
I will recognize you. I also will be bringing my laptop computer
and mobile phone along with the $6,415. It will be in cash, which
for tax purposes is better for me.
Dr. Brad Christensen
----- Original Message -----
From: princefortune@ubbi.com
To: bradchristensen@cox.net
Sent: Saturday, December 11, 2004 7:01 AM
Subject: SAVE JOURNEY
Dear Brad
I am in receipt of your flight confirmation.
I wish you safe journey. My confidential secretary for years and
my trusted son in law would be at the airport to receive you.
They will cary sign board bearing your name-
"BRAD". I remeber that I am a popular person in Dakar
and considering the kind of transaction we are doing, it might
not be okay for us for press people to cover us at the airport.
They will take you to a good hotel where I
will then come to meet you.
I am very excited and previledged to meet in
person one of the most talented surgeon in the world.
Yours good friend
Princewill
Dear Princewill Fortune Boneradventure:
My limousine driver says it's time to go to the airport in Los
Angeles so I only have a few minutes to write you. Please put
"Dr. Brad" on the sign instead of just "Brad."
That's because Brad is a fairly common name in the U.S. and there
may be more than one "Brad" on the plane. I do not want
to be confused with Brad Pitt. You've seen my photo so you're
certainly aware of the resemblance. To help avoid any confusion,
I will be wearing a stethoscope and surgical gloves.
I'll be bringing my laptop and my mobile phone (number XXX-XXX-XXXX)
with me, but while in the air the phone will be switched to "off."
Ben Affleck's recovery is progressing nicely, by the way, although
he's having a difficult time adjusting to his new career as a
flea wrangler. Sure he has all the necessary equipment now, including
a wire brush to glean new recruits from the coyotes. It's the
training aspect that seems to puzzle Ben. Fleas are supposed to
be trained with tuning forks, but Ben is tone deaf and just can't
get the hang of it. As an alternative, Ben has fashioned a tiny
whip out of dental floss. We are hopeful the fleas will respond
to a little discipline.
I will see you soon,
Dr. Brad Christensen
----- Original Message -----
From: princefortune@ubbi.com
To: bradchristensen@cox.net
Sent: Tuesday, December 14, 2004 11:05 AM
Subject: Where are you,
Dr Brad,
I am very confussed, where are you now? I was
at the airport on 13th when South Africa airline arrived Senegal
by 7.20 in the morning and left 8.45,My family and I was hoping
to receive you from the airport but all were to no avail.I have
tried calling your number in America but no body was there to
pick the phone,Please can you tell me what is happening? I am
worried to read from you,at least to be rest assured that all
is well with you.
Write me back as soon as possible through this
email address.or call me now with this number,221-5719140.
Regards,
Princewill.
Dear Princewill Fortune Boneradventure:
You'll be happy to hear that I'm alright, but extremely exhausted
and hungry after 38 straight hours of tending to a patient. It
all began after I boarded the plane for the trip to Dakar and
flew to New York where I was to change planes. My Ronco molded
plastic medical beeper went off signaling an emergency at Blythe
International Hospital. I grabbed the next plane back to California
and learned upon my arrival that Ben Affleck was near death!
It appears that Ben's use of the dental floss whip had sparked
an immediate flea uprising. His subjects became extremely hostile
and violently attacked him. Escape was impossible. Did you know
that fleas can jump nearly 100 times the length of their bodies
-- the same as a person jumping nearly 1,000 feet? Fleas also
accelerate the equivalent of 50 times faster than a space shuttle
does after liftoff! Ben was helpless. And when the fleas were
finished, 98 percent of Ben's body was covered with bites. Some
of the bites resulted in bubonic plague, epidemic typhus and the
worst bout of halitosis I have ever experienced.
With Ben hanging onto life by a thread, I initiated and aggressive
treatment regime that included a two-quart vaporizer, Vicks VapoRub,
and 32 ounces of extra-strength Scope. Finally Ben is beginning
to recover.
My apologies for not contacting you sooner, but I had no time
for anything other than saving a man's life. Certainly you will
understand this. I myself am quite upset by the unavoidable turn
of events. A $3,000-plus airline ticket wasted and our multi-million-dollar
business deal delayed -- you better believe I'm charging Ben up
the kazoo for that Scope. I believe I can schedule another trip
to Dakar for this coming weekend. What do you think?
Dr. Brad Christensen
----- Original Message -----
From: princefortune@ubbi.com
To: bradchristensen@cox.net
Sent: Wednesday, December 15, 2004 12:04 PM
Subject: Urgent Reply Needed
Dear Dr. Brad,
It would be okay if you can make it over this
weekend. But any time beyound this weekend is not suitable for
me as we shall be busy in the office doing checks and balances
of end of year 2004 fiscal transactions.
So let me know immediately if you can make
it to Dakar from now till Saturday/Sunday. But if you cannot make,
let us then suspend the deal till January next year.
Regards,
Princewill.
Dear Princewill Fortune Boneradventure:
I understand about checks and balances. Until recently, the U.S.
government operated under that very system. Anyway, we are in
luck. There is a flight that departs Los Angeles on Friday and
arrives in Dakar very early on Sunday. It leaves LAX and has connections
to change planes in London and in Casablanca, Morocco before arriving
in Dakar as Royal Air Maroc Flight 503 on Sunday, Dec. 19, at
2:20 a.m. I understand this is extremely early in the morning,
but it is the only available flight, and an expensive one at that.
I will purchase the $5,513 ticket immediately.
There will be no interruptions this time. Ben has agreed to indefinitely
suspend his flea-training program.
Dr. Brad Christensen
----- Original Message -----
From: princefortune@ubbi.com
To: bradchristensen@cox.net
Sent: Thursday, December 16, 2004 12:21 PM
Subject: You are Welcome!
Dear Dr. Brad,
Okay, I will be waiting again for your arrival
at the sheduled time and date.
Let me know when you are about boarding flight.
Meanwhile, my secretary shall be carrying again "DR BRAD"
at Leopold Sedar Senghor International Airport at Dakar.
Regards,
Princewill.
Dear Princewill Fortune Boneradventure:
I purchased the ticket this afternoon and will e-mail you on Friday,
before my chauffeur Morgan Freeman drives Miss Daisy and me to
the airport. Miss Daisy is my personal assistant. She's getting
up there in years but her walker gives her the support she needs
to haul my bags to the airport terminal. Hopefully you'll have
somebody carry my bags when I arrive in Dakar. I am a surgeon
and cannot risk damaging my hands.
Dr. Brad Christensen
Dear Princewell Fortune Boneradventure:
I'm leaving for the airport right now. I will see you in Dakar
at 2:20 a.m. at Royal Air Maroc Flight 503 on Sunday, Dec. 19.
I will have the $6.415 with me in a briefcase.
Dr. Brad Christensen
Dear Princewill Fortune Boneradventure:
I'm in Casablanca, Morocco now. I missed my connecting flight
and have been spending my time at Rick's Cafe Americain while
I waited for another flight to Dakar. I'm fed up with this place.
The damned piano player, some guy named Sam, knows only one song
and keeps playing it again and again.
Anyway, I noticed that you tried to telephone me. Sponge Bob
also called me, and unlike you, he left a message. He said he
has gained way too much weight this holiday season and is in dire
need of some surgical slicing and dicing to fit into his square
pants. I was going to blow him off because of our important business
in Dakar.
But who should walk into Rick's but Sponge Bob's mother! Of all
the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into
mine! Well, she confronts me and says:
"Inside of us, we both know you belong with Sponge Bob.
You're part of his work -- the thing that keeps him going. If
that plane back to Blythe leaves the ground and you're not on
it, you'll regret it. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but
soon. And for the rest of your life."
Well, Princewill, I've decided to give up on our transaction
and return to Blythe. I've got a job to to and where I'm going
you can't follow. What I've got to do, you can't be any part of.
Princewill, I'm no good at being noble, but it doesn't take much
to see that the problems of two little people don't amount to
a hill of beans in this crazy world. Some day you'll understand
that.
Here's looking at you, kid.
Dr. Brad Christensen
Back
to the Exhibit
