The boring bastards Gardening/Allotment thread

[SteveUK]

So, I've just got my first allotment, and I don't have a fucking clue what I'm doing.

When you folk were in this situation, how did you find your way?

[hucknallred]

Gave it up 2 years later...

Seriously. How big is it?

The biggest enemy are weeds.

[bmxninja357]

Plant water harvest. Little pullin weeds. Garden plants if your not looking for a fashion statement are super easy. The web will give ya an outline. But way easier than you would think.
And plants love heavy metal

And that is soundgardening advice.
(maybe that will sneak past burnaby. Lol.)


Peace,
Ninj

[AndyK]

...
And plants love heavy metal
...

Music or toxic waste?

[Burnaby49]

Plant water harvest. Little pullin weeds. Garden plants if your not looking for a fashion statement are super easy. The web will give ya an outline. But way easier than you would think.
And plants love heavy metal

And that is soundgardening advice.
(maybe that will sneak past burnaby. Lol.)


Peace,
Ninj

They can discuss what they want on the UK board as long as they don't slag real ale.

[eric]

It's really a tough problem. Get a shovel, dig up some dirt, put your seeds in, water as required, and see what happens. If it doesn't grow right or requires too much work, you picked the wrong thing to grow. There's lots of information out there on the interweb but it's not rocket science.
1. Most salad type veggies are easy to grow and are low maintenance;
2. Avoid anything that takes a lot of work and requires specific growing conditions such as tomatoes or your special brand of parsnips that have to be dug up on the dark of the moon on Good Friday.
3. It's not a competition, it's something you have to enjoy.
4. When in doubt grow potatoes, and chemicals are your friend.
Old male family saying... Men grow potatoes, women grow pansies.

I won't get into the politics and culture of allotments in your neck of the world. Around here they are probably vastly different (sorry after ten years on the waiting list you can't get one since you aren't a refugee who wants to grow items that are culturally appropriate) or we can only accept you if you grow organic non-GMO kale.
Oh, did I forget to mention I'm a farmer and come from a farming family....

[Burnaby49]

One word of advice I can give, don't grow broad beans. I love them, buy them all the time canned, but the one time I tried to grow them it was a disaster. Turns out there is some aphid that loves them even more than I do. I learned this as soon as we started getting a crop. It was overwhelmed with the bastards. Maybe there's a way of controlling them now but back thirty years ago it was "tough luck".