The real way to TP Heaven

[The Observer]

From an ABC News article about the new Osama video:

He also speaks to recent issues grabbing headlines in the United States, referring to "the reeling of many of you under the burden of interest-related debts, insane taxes and real estate mortgages; global warming and its woes..."

"To conclude," bin Laden says, "I invite you to embrace Islam." He goes on to say: "There are no taxes in Islam, but rather there is a limited Zakaat [alms] totaling 2.5 percent."

Someone needs to get this to Ed Brown's attention - he converted to the wrong religion.

[grammarian44]

. . . the burden of interest-related debts

He's right! From now on, I'm going to make sure that when I borrow money, it's interest-free.

[The Observer]

Such disappointment. This post has been up for over 3 hours and I expected someone - grixit, wserra, somebody - to bring up the ability of Ed Brown to become the first Constitutional Mujahedeen.

[grixit]

No no-- his followers will be the mujahadeen. Ed Brown will be the Mahdi.

[RyanMcC]

So Bin Laden is going to give us a tax cut to 2.5 percent?

Just today I heard on the radio a discussion, "what could Bin Laden say that some of our elected representatives haven't said already". Well, now we have an answer, a tax cut to 2.5%.

The only way I can see the IRS beat that is if they send all taxpayers 72 virgins..

I'm not falling for it though, the original income tax started at about 1%, and for only the richest Americans. They always jack the rate up on ya though once you are hooked.

[silversopp]

So Bin Laden is going to give us a tax cut to 2.5 percent?

Just today I heard on the radio a discussion, "what could Bin Laden say that some of our elected representatives haven't said already". Well, now we have an answer, a tax cut to 2.5%.

The only way I can see the IRS beat that is if they send all taxpayers 72 virgins.

But Maxim and FHM would no longer feature the quality of pictures that we have all come to enjoy.

I'd rather pay higher taxes and be able to see some skin.

[LPC]

"There are no taxes in Islam, but rather there is a limited Zakaat [alms] totaling 2.5 percent."

The Zakaat is not an income tax, but a tax on the net worth of an individual. (I.e, it's a capitation.)

And Saudi Arabia seems to be the only country with such a tax. (In Iran, which also has an Islamic government, earned income is subject to tax at rates up to 35%.) Saudi Arabia is also one of the Mideast countries ruled by a monarch whose family owns all of the oil. Which means that the government already controls the oil revenues, and additional tax revenues would be almost superfluous.

[grixit]

So Bin Laden is going to give us a tax cut to 2.5 percent?

Just today I heard on the radio a discussion, "what could Bin Laden say that some of our elected representatives haven't said already". Well, now we have an answer, a tax cut to 2.5%.

The only way I can see the IRS beat that is if they send all taxpayers 72 virgins..

Ok, that's the part about Islam that i think is one of its biggest flaws. Really, honestly, what man would want to spend eternity with only virgins, in whatever number? These are permanent virgins which means that they never learn anything, every time is the first time. That kind of limits the experience. I think the only men who are looking forward to that situation must themselves be virgins.

[The Observer]

A long-term flaw designed to deal with the short-term flaw of polygamy. After all, what do you promise the surplus of men out there after the wealthy and powerful have married off the available women to themselves?

[grixit]

Well, if i were a clever and devious member of the religious elite, i'd preach that contact with women was a brutal and harrowing task forced upon the rulers as the price of their wealth, while poor men were free to enjoy God's greatest gift: homosexuality.

(And if you read Rumi, it seems that that last part is the first principle of Islam)

[The Observer]

It would never work, for the same reason that trying through therapy to convert homosexuals to heterosexualty doesn't work: genetics. The followers are going to go where their genes tell them to go.

Plus, how do you explain to your followers why do you keep keep emerging from your harem with a grin on your face everday?

[Truthstalker]

To those of you who believe the "Osama" video is genuine I would like to offer ownership shares in this local bridge I recently acquired.

[The Observer]

The point of this thread had nothing to do with whether the Osama video was genuine. Rather, it was about the substance of the message being that Islam doesn't overtax its adherents. So if you have information that the video didn't say that, or that Islam does have a higher rate of taxation than the video claimed, I would be interested in hearing about that - at least that would indicate that you did some solid research. Otherwise you are wasting bandwidth on conspiracy theories again.

[RyanMcC]

The point of this thread had nothing to do with whether the Osama video was genuine. Rather, it was about the substance of the message being that Islam doesn't overtax its adherents. So if you have information that the video didn't say that, or that Islam does have a higher rate of taxation than the video claimed, I would be interested in hearing about that - at least that would indicate that you did some solid research. Otherwise you are wasting bandwidth on conspiracy theories again.

I watched part of the video on Youtube, at the 2 minute mark the video froze, but the audio kept going. In the 3 minute video I was able to see I didn't hear him mention the Zakaat. Only how he was bleeding us dry economically (I think he took notes on how we brought down the USSR).

Anyone have a link to the video?

I could only find this one on youtube:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=qekIchQaBOk

Osama reminds me of Emmanuel Goldstein for some reason..

[Truthstalker]

If the tape is a fraud, who cares what it says?

As to the original point of this thread, since when has anyone around here stayed with an original point for long?

[RyanMcC]

If the tape is a fraud, who cares what it says?

People who want to prove it's fake, and people who are curious about Fake Osama's tax policies..

But yeah, after seeing that picture of Elaine I wish the Browns were Muslim so Ed would put a berka on her..

[grammarian44]

If the tape is a fraud, who cares what it says?

Because as long as other people believe it is genuine, it will have the same amount of influence on public opinion as if it were genuine.

Of course, just because it will have influence doesn't mean it should. And in my opinion it should be disregarded whether genuine or not. Even if every word came straight from Osama's mouth, the tape is crap.

No, I take that back. the tape should have one form of influence for sure: it should remind the U.S. of just how completely it forgot about the direct perpetrators of 9/11 in its zeal to offer deferred punishment to Iraq for unrelated acts about fifteen years ago.

[Truthstalker]

I guess the next time one of those "rednecks" lays that Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion crap on me I shouldn't point out that it's a forgery. After all, if people believe it's genuine we need to consider it, right?

[LPC]

A long-term flaw designed to deal with the short-term flaw of polygamy. After all, what do you promise the surplus of men out there after the wealthy and powerful have married off the available women to themselves?

A Mormon sect that practices polygamy seems to solve the problem by expelling teenage boys.

See http://www.nytimes.com/2007/09/09/us/09 ... tml?ref=us

The leader of that particular sect is Warren Jeffs, who is currently being held in jail and facing trial on rape charges because he allegedly helped force a 14 year old girl to "marry" her cousin.

[The Observer]

The Warren Jeffs cult was a good example of what lengths one has to go to in order to justify polygamy. One shudders to think what would have transpired if there had been no central police authority to stop Jeffs. It could have evolved into a situation where male infanticide would have developed to artificially control female:male ratio.