Help save the Pacific N'west Tree Octopus

[bmielke]

Last night Big Foot was in my back yard, so I took my 12 GA and now my taxidermist is stuffing it. What does one do with a 11 foot tal 1/2 man 1/2 ape statue?

[webhick]

Last night Big Foot was in my back yard, so I took my 12 GA and now my taxidermist is stuffing it. What does one do with a 11 foot tal 1/2 man 1/2 ape statue?

Scare the dog.

[wserra]

While you're at it, don't forget the landshark.

[webhick]

And tree ferrets.

BTW, on the way into work today I actually saw a turkey fly up from the ground and perch on the power lines. I've seen turkeys fly up into the trees for the night, I've seen them fall out of trees, I've seen them hopscotch over cars, but never this. I think they've had it with the snow.

[Parvati]

re: turkeys

I think they've had it with the snow.

My wild guys have been hanging around in the plowed part of the farmyard near the bird feeders waiting to glean the scatterings from the littler birds. I've been feeding them since the last big snow, though--they have to eat a significant amount of food to survive, and the unmelting snowpack has been hard on them.

[bmielke]

And tree ferrets.

BTW, on the way into work today I actually saw a turkey fly up from the ground and perch on the power lines. I've seen turkeys fly up into the trees for the night, I've seen them fall out of trees, I've seen them hopscotch over cars, but never this. I think they've had it with the snow.

I grew turkeys for a food pantry once, (I would never do it again, "We're not going to take the birds because they are 20-25 lbs each" what was I supposed to do stop feeding them? The grain store gets them in March the processor won't process until September. I digress) Mine liked sun bathing on top of my Uncle's SUV. We have pictures some place of turkey tracks up and down the car.

[bmielke]

Anyone have a surefire way to get rid of a nasty infestation of Jackalopes? They ate my carrots last year and I am going to sit by and watch the horrific destruction again.

[webhick]

Anyone have a surefire way to get rid of a nasty infestation of Jackalopes? They ate my carrots last year and I am going to sit by and watch the horrific destruction again.

Anything that turns them into a fine red mist works. But if you just want to sit by and watch the horrified destruction, move them to someone else's carrot patch and watch from afar.

[bmielke]

Two - claymores, backed up with punji stick traps and dead falls. Also effective against opossums, racoons, rabbits, hares, deer, annoying unpopular relatives, Mormons and Jehovah's Witnesses.

Locks like I got me a weekend project

[bmielke]

Back on point - SAVE THE PACIFIC NORTHWEST TREE OCTOPUS!!

http://zapatopi.net/treeoctopus/

Did you look at the FAQ?

What percentage of profit from Tree Octopus products sold on this site goes to support protecting the species?

None.

Tree Octopuses don't need your money. They need your love and willingness to write angry letters to the editor demanding action.

Regardless, I would like to donate money to help the Tree Octopus. How can I do this?

If you must give money to ease your conscience, donations to help the Tree Octopus should be given directly to the Tree Octopuses. Here is how to donate: Travel to the Olympic Peninsula (if you are a minor, ask your parents first). Stand in the Tree Octopuses' forest near a tree and hold out a dollar bill. If you stand still enough, eventually a Tree Octopus will come by on a branch, reach out, and take the bill with her suckers. She will continue to return for more bills as long as you hold them out, so bring lots of singles. She will use them to line her den in the trees, as the bills will soak up rain water and keep her skin moist. Given the current value of the dollar, this is the most cost effective way to help.

Please note: don't give them coins. While they are attracted to shiny objects and will gladly take coins, the toxic metals in coins (especially copper) can easily absorb into their skin and poison them. Paper money, checks, stock certificates, coupons, etc. are preferable and make better nesting material.

[Brandybuck]

Two - claymores, backed up with punji stick traps and dead falls. Also effective against opossums, racoons, rabbits, hares, deer, annoying unpopular relatives, Mormons and Jehovah's Witnesses.

Folks, please, please, PLEASE, remember to check your traps regularly. There is nothing more heart wrenching than watching a Jehovah's Witness slowly die of gangrene. Take a gun with you and take them out of their misery.

[webhick]

There is nothing more heart wrenching than watching a Jehovah's Witness slowly die of gangrene.

Really? Because I've spent at least three dates doing just that. It's very romantic.

[Cathulhu]

I'm quite familiar with the website you found the tree octopus on--it also gives excellent instructions on making your own tinfoil hat, so I'm sure Davy and Harv are interested.

[bmielke]

Two - claymores, backed up with punji stick traps and dead falls. Also effective against opossums, racoons, rabbits, hares, deer, annoying unpopular relatives, Mormons and Jehovah's Witnesses.

Folks, please, please, PLEASE, remember to check your traps regularly. There is nothing more heart wrenching than watching a Jehovah's Witness slowly die of gangrene. Take a gun with you and take them out of their misery.

I find once every three says is about enough. Any more than that and your scent lingers too much.