Peter of England and WeaRe not a Bank

[notorial dissent]

Some people want conspiracies to be true so badly they will shun all logic and rationale.

I think it's the same with Peter.

I'm still suprised he's lasted so long on Germany and Austria with his Jew bashing tho, they don't take kindly to intolerance of other religions these days.

Depends on the crowd he is dealing with. I get the feeling this crowd isn't exactly mainstream or rational. There are still some very virulent anti-semitc groups in both Germany and Austria, and some speculate it is getting worse.

[SteveUK]

I think these people 'need to believe'. To acknowledge the BS would mean (1) admitting that you've been had, and prob have fallen for other similar schemes and (2) you've failed so miserably at life that your best chance of getting rich is via crackpot schemes.

[notorial dissent]

SteveUK, I think to a large degree you are absolutely correct. It also helps if you are also really really stupid and gullible and tend to fall for everything like this that comes down the path, as I agree/think many of these people are.

[Zeke_the_Meek]

SteveUK, I think to a large degree you are absolutely correct. It also helps if you are also really really stupid and gullible and tend to fall for everything like this that comes down the path, as I agree/think many of these people are.

Well, quite. And to point to a specific example, remember our goodf friend Hayles Owen?

She's still not quite getting it. I messaged her on Facebook months ago when she was raving about how the Mafia had clearly intercepted her WeRe fees and was driving over to his office to chat to Peter. I was curious to know how her visit went - apparently she didn't make it, because she messaged me back today and the road trip is still on the cards:

Me: Hey, hope you're well. Random question, but did you ever have any luck with Peter of England?

[months later]

Hayles: Hey Zeke... only just pick'd up your message sorry about that... not really ... someone by the name of BAKER signed for my silver reg'd postal envelope, but with 3 PN's and 35£ x 3, i am gutted to say the very least... he has an office just off JI5 of the M6... maybe i should pop in and say hi... wheres' my debit card/s... i've come to pick them up

Me: No worries! Assume you didn't get the memo though, but he got kicked out of that office MONTHS ago. He's been touring Germany for the best part of a year. I fear nobody who has sent money to that office (or Ducie street) will see it - or him - again.

Make of that what you will.

[Hercule Parrot]

Make of that what you will.

She's still very stupid and gullible, seems to be the key message.

[notorial dissent]

Make of that what you will.

She's still very stupid and gullible, seems to be the key message.

Exactly the demographic that PoE was looking for and counting on.

[Zeke_the_Meek]

A truly enlightening conversation with Hayles Owen this morning, and by enlightening, I mean nonsensical.

Come join me on a rare occurance as we make connection with a real, wild Goodfer in its natural habitat and observe the strange machinations inside of its mind in real time!

I don't know why she chooses to be linguistically incompetent in not just one, but two different languages. She's not French, she's Welsh.

Hey Zeke... only just pick'd up your message sorry about that... not really ... someone by the name of BAKER signed for my silver reg'd postal envelope, but with 3 PN's and 35£ x 3, i am gutted to say the very least... he has an office just off JI5 of the M6... maybe i should pop in and say hi... wheres' my debit card/s... i've come to pick them up

No worries! Assume you didn't get the memo though, but he got kicked out of that office MONTHS ago. He's been touring Germany for the best part of a year. I fear nobody who has sent money to that office (or Ducie street) will see it - or him - again.

worried 'bout 3 PNs though... 3 NI no's on a IOyr bonned/

If it's any consolation, PoE's such an incompetent scammer I genuinely don't think he'll be able to cash in on them. It's probably not even legally possible to do so, though obviously if there's any possibility of tracking him down and getting them back, do that! Why did you sign up in the first place?

can we talk
r you FREE rite now
wear en le monde r ewe

I'm in [REDACTED] - more than happy to talk but I'm at work right now

r a SLAY v E
oops sleigh v e

Heh, not really. I enjoy my job and like not having money worries.

ewe A v E sum l'earning tu du
i dont a v e ennie worr ie.s eyether[e]... will [it] I3 go'd 2 [s]talk he-he
spent two mutch l'earning this GLOSS A of thiers Zeke

You don't have any worries? "worried 'bout 3 PNs though... 3 NI no's on a IOyr bonned/"

nope... Go'd 'deals' me none x
nope... cos le addy is non x ist ant
it was just a 'service addy
/cud I3 a church ser v ice haha/
du ewe a v e a famille
/two worrie a bowt/
/goo'd tu spell owt of go ogles re-mit[ten/IO 2 lol/

As for learning, one of us sent £100 to an obvious scammer. The other one spent time learning basic English.

/they cant in decks if ewe youz / / @ eyeth r end .. a pe tit tip/

I have absolutely no idea what you're trying to say.

/haha /
eye j'abite en france
/mon mari est Francais/

Ok.

What do you do for a living?

/eye 'ave keyboard anglais haha payne en le butt for axe sents ... en angleterre on e'st off/
/I li v e lol/
/watt du ewe du/

I work for the government

haha
pour sole
/du-ing watt x act ly[e]/
?

watt is your JOB roll

I'm an executive in the Ministry of Truth

ewe ON A BRAKE/we say pause en france]
haha
i am knot en thier system of lies/entrapment

Trust me, you are. I have the records.

/so watt r u du-ing talking w'en ewe shud I3 werking/
haha eye waz butt no longER
/watt re-cords r they then lol/
i ave no berth cert az i am RC
i dont trust ewe ennie way
/eye[s] dont trust ennie I/
/own lee G'd az e iz le own lee I ooh k'an gug ME/

You do right not to trust anyone.
They're watching you, Hayles.
Anyway, good luck out there.

g'et bk 2 werk... eye[z] 'ave moor studdie 2 du

It was nice talking. I'll update our records.

/coo'l <3/sew is GOD/
/'ow du ewe no thay r/
/eye du cos eye ow[e]n A tek co[w]/

What's a tech cow? Is that some kind of mechanised beef?

/4-5g/
/co with a si-lent w... moo'n /
/le pe tit chien lol'd tu c sutch fun est le dish ran a way[owt] with le spoo'n/lol/
/got go ogle anna lit-ics skillz 2/
/au revoir/
passez une bonne journée

I'd go start out with critical thinking skills first, but I shall leave you to it. Au revoir, mon petit mouton.

haha tre bon
/mouton=mutton= bahh lol/

[TheCoz]

I don't know how you even managed to communicate...

Why do people type like this? Do they think they are casting spells or something?

[Forsyth]

And there I was thinking that Miles Kington had died and gone to, well, wherever dead humorists go to, but obviously he just retired to take serious amounts of acid and post on the internet.

But yes, credit to Zeke for maintaining the dialogue, though I find myself curious as to whether it would have made any difference at all if Zeke had just replied "Fish fish fish, fish!" to everything.

[notorial dissent]

It certainly wouldn't have much impaired the narrative. I can't tell if she is just tryign to be cute, or is it clever, or else really needs serious help.

[Pox]

It certainly wouldn't have much impaired the narrative. I can't tell if she is just tryign to be cute, or is it clever, or else really needs serious help.

I think the first option, but she needs more practice.

[grixit]

ewe A v E sum l'earning tu du
i dont a v e ennie worr ie.s eyether[e]... will [it] I3 go'd 2 [s]talk he-he
spent two mutch l'earning this GLOSS A of thiers Zeke

"Glossa" is one of the synonyms for "legalese" used by sovs. It's the usual claim that legal terminology is more than just technical it actually hides reality.

The only thing i can think of is that her jumbled words and sentences are to avoid accidental glossa usage which would put her under jurisdiction.

[The Observer]

Yes, nothing worse than being hauled into Grammar and Spelling Court and found guilty.

[Hercule Parrot]

watt is your JOB roll
I'm an executive in the Ministry of Truth
i am knot en thier system of lies/entrapment
Trust me, you are. I have the records.

Magnificent...

[AndyPandy]

watt is your JOB roll
I'm an executive in the Ministry of Truth
i am knot en thier system of lies/entrapment
Trust me, you are. I have the records.

Magnificent...

I'm surprised you didn't put 'Ministry of Magic', the gullible is very strong in that one !

[exiledscouser]

watt is your JOB roll
I'm an executive in the Ministry of Truth
i am knot en thier system of lies/entrapment
Trust me, you are. I have the records.

Magnificent...

I'm surprised you didn't put 'Ministry of Magic', the gullible is very strong in that one !

Well of course, he did put that but being a Muggle Hayles only saw what she;

"1-tent teD tew [c]"

Anyway, enough of Owen's bollocks; where the feck is Smith? He's seems to have vanished just like his claim that Assange has escaped the Ecuadorean embassy.

What are his 1,000s of weary bank customers doing about it? Why haven't they complained to someone, anyone, him even - their silence is telling. He just seems to have given up on Were Bank altogether and on all those who joined up - they were just not worthy!

It was after all a scam from day one, one man's fiendish scheme to identify Britain's most gullible.

Perhaps the alt-right scene in German speaking countries is more receptive to English con-men, we will see. There was an excellent poster from Germany who contributed to this thread who might be able to trawl the darker recesses of germanophone websites.

It would be a shame if this long running thread should have to die through Smith's apathy, with a whimper not a bang, fizzled out like a wet firework but that's how it's looking with no new post since December.

What next for our hero?

[SteveUK]

His FB page has been dead as a dodo since pre xmas. I beleive he's currently touring Germany.....

[notorial dissent]

His FB page has been dead as a dodo since pre xmas. I beleive he's currently touring Germany.....

Or just hiding out from his UK suckersclients? It doesn't sound like he ever got much of a toehold in either Germany or Austria, and the few adherents he had, at least the ones who used his funny paper all either ended up in jail or had really bad public experiences.

[Zeke_the_Meek]

His FB page has been dead as a dodo since pre xmas. I beleive he's currently touring Germany.....

Or just hiding out from his UK suckersclients? It doesn't sound like he ever got much of a toehold in either Germany or Austria, and the few adherents he had, at least the ones who used his funny paper all either ended up in jail or had really bad public experiences.

He's definitely still on the continent - someone in the German FB page comments mentioned he's got a speaking event in Austria at some point this month.

No idea exactly when or where, because he's in the hilarious position of having to hide his whereabouts yet also trying to advertise his guru lectures at the same time. Stuck between a rock and a WeRe cheque.

The disappointing end to this saga continues to whimper on.

[katiHWB]

He's definitely still on the continent - someone in the German FB page comments mentioned he's got a speaking event in Austria at some point this month.

I have Austrian relatives ... I'll see if they can find anything out